Supporting Children through Change

Helping kids feel steady during transitions

Change can be exciting but for children, it can also be confusing and overwhelming. Moves, new schools, language barriers, or family transitions often bring big emotions that children can’t always name. When adults understand how change affects kids, we can help them feel safe and supported as they adjust.

1. Acknowledge what’s happening.

Children pick up on stress, even when adults don’t say much. Let them know that change is real, and that it’s okay to have mixed feelings about it. Simple statements like, “I know things are different right now,” or “It’s okay to feel unsure,” give children permission to express what they’re feeling.

2. Keep routines where you can.

Predictability helps children feel grounded. Even if everything around them is shifting, such as new surroundings, people, or schedules, keeping familiar routines (bedtime rituals, meals, story time) sends the message that some things remain steady.

3. Offer choice and participation.

Giving children small, age-appropriate choices helps restore a sense of control. Let them choose which toy to pack first, what snack to bring to a new school, or how to decorate their new room. These moments of agency help them feel more capable in uncertain times.

Personally, when we came to visit Mexico City before our family’s move to complete some paperwork, I tried to give my teen some autonomy. We toured a few potential schools he might attend and nudged him to ask as many questions and voice concerns to their staff. In the end, he chose the school that had a more challenging academic program, more extracurricular activities that aligned with his interest, and agreed with him that homework must be meaningful and not busywork (😉).

4. Model calm and openness.

Children learn emotional regulation by watching adults. When you take a breath, name your own feelings gently (“I feel nervous about the move too.”), and model self-care, you’re teaching resilience through example. You don’t have to be perfectly calm, just honest and grounded.

5. Create space for connection.

Transitions often scatter attention and routines. Try to protect small moments of closeness, such as a walk, bedtime talk, shared music, or silly playtime. These small connections are the anchors that help children feel safe enough to adapt. Put your phone down, turn off the electronics, and engage intentionally in the moment with your child. Not only is this good for their neurodevelopment and adjustment, but you’ll create special memories that your child and you will appreciate for a long time.

6. Get support when needed.

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, a child struggles to adjust. This doesn’t mean something is “wrong,” but it means they might need extra help. Talking to a trauma-informed social worker or counselor can help you understand what’s happening underneath your child’s reactions and create strategies that fit your family’s rhythm.

At Tierra Firme, I support parents and families navigating change, whether that’s a move, a new school, or simply growing through a challenging season. Together, we look for ways to restore steadiness and connection, helping both you and your child feel more at home where you are.

✨Takeaway✨

Change is easier when children feel heard, safe, and connected. Small, consistent moments of support can help the whole family find firmer ground.